How The Hunted TV Programme Is Like Parenting

The Hunted map

I love the Channel 4 programme ‘The Hunted.’ For those of you that haven’t watched the programme it follows Brits as they go on the run from our surveillance state. Now, for someone who is a prolific user of all social media I am fascinated by this idea. Why? Because deep down (believe it or not), I am quite private. I am also rather distrustful with the level of surveillance we are all under which is one of the reasons why I refrained from joining Facebook for so long. I have been thinking about The Hunted and why, as a mum, I would make the perfect contestant:

 

  • On the run means you remain undetected. Have you met my two children? They can find me hiding in the wardrobe as I try to scoff a chocolate biscuit in peace.

 

  • Past contestants have said that taking part in the programme turned them into a “paranoid savage”. Welcome to parenting. That Health Visitor, teacher, midwife, elderly lady in the shop. They had better watch out, you will turn on them if they dare criticise your parenting skills! Do not talk to me about breastfeeding after a night of no sleep!

 

  • Begging strangers. Sometimes in The Hunted the contestants have to rely on the help of strangers to survive. The same can be said of parenting. When you are desperate for a good night’s sleep we will turn to those online parenting forums, you know the ones where penis beakers are discussed at length, aka Mumsnet.

 

  • The key to a good day of parenting is constantly staying on the move. The same can be said for The Hunted. If you stay still too long then your child/investigator will sniff you out and destroy you! Keep moving!

 

  • You rely on the kindness of strangers. In The Hunted it is giving you a lift in a car to your next destination. In parenting it is when a stranger sees you dealing with a temper tantrum and they tell you that they have all been there;  that it does get easier. On both counts you want to hug them.

 

  • When it is quiet you have a sense of impending doom. In parenting you are waiting for the kids to kick off; in The Hunted you are waiting for those investigators to sweep in.

 

  • The Hunted sees contestants getting twitchy and moody; much like me after a night of no sleep thanks to little ones.

 

  • The Hunted sees contestants not realising how hard it will be physically and emotionally. Same for parenting. That first week after giving birth – HELLO!

 

  • The Hunted requires you to be wiley and secretive. Parenting uses the same skills. My kids do not know about my secret sweet supply.

 

  • The Hunted requires you to vanish. Being a stay-at-home mum means that it often feels like you have vanished from society.

 

  • The Hunted has automatic plate recognition. Stay-at-home mums have similar automatic recognition. Nest for hair, bags under eyes, yoghurt handprints on trousers, hello fellow mummy.

 

  • The Hunted is unpredictable and so is parenting.

 

The Hunted might be like parenting but is it wrong that I am actually considering going on The Hunted for a holiday?

 

What do you think? Is The Hunted like parenting?

 

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  1. I do like the hunted and I can look at it with a whole new perspective now! I’d go further than begging strangers on Mumsnet and beg them in the street. With my second child, while my first needs a wee – anybody will do to look after baby number 2. I sometimes laugh while they’re having a tantrum and question nearby shoppers “why are they like this”, they think I’m kidding. I could write something about each of your points because they’re hilariously spot-on but I’ll stop at the emotional and physical pains of parenting. The only time you can have major surgery or have serious body dismembering and be sent home the next day, is child birth. You’re put through the wringer emotionally and physically and sent off with a little Bounty pack. Liberty. #fridayfrolics

  3. Ha ha, this is so true. Especially about relying on the kindness of strangers -I have revelled in positive feedback from random people in the street. And as for the impending doom – so true. My daughter went quiet yesterday and I was happy for a second and then thought – oh no…. #FridayFrolics

  4. I haven’t seen The Hunted but I really want to now, it sounds brilliant! You are so right though, gone are the days when I didn’t have to share a chocolate bar! #fridayfrolics

  6. This sounds like an interesting TV programme! The one that is definitely me on this list is the hiding whilst eating. I have discovered that the secret to, erm, secret eating is to always eat dark chocolate and preferably mint flavoured, as it is disliked by Piglet, then hide the offending choc in a secret cupboard and scoff quietly whilst he watches Thomas on Netflix. I’m becoming a pro. #FridayFrolics

  9. I’ve never seen the programme, but I definitely feel hunted by my daughter at times. No matter how absorbed she is in a toy, the second I get up to go for a pee or do some chores, she’s toddling after me. There’s no escape! #FridayFrolics

  10. Eldest told me about this show so I know the concept. Love these kind of posts! Really made me chuckle….Not sure mummyhood has a cash prize at the end of it, but if you survive it does have it’s own rewards!!

  11. My daughter watches this and loves it. I like your analogies. Would it be a holiday though? I once applied to go on, Bear Grylls: The Island for a break…I think I got a distorted view from my comfy sofa! Alison x #FridayFrolics

  15. I’ve never heard of this show over here in the States, but it sounds very cool. I’d imagine if its successful on your side of the pond, we’ll have our own version soon enough. Assuming we still have a country in another few weeks….#fridayfrolics

  16. OHMYGOSH, you reminded me of the ghastly know-it-alls who proactively “informed me” that my breastfeeding challenges were due to my not trying hard enough. This after much lactation consulting AND weird stickums that I’d put on my nipples so that my poor babies had something to latch onto. KISS IT, you hags! #FridayFrolics

  18. Haha – it does sound pretty similar! I haven’t seen The Hunted, but it sounds like something I might like – perhaps I should try it! #FridayFrolics(Apologies for terrible timekeeping – the chaos of moving has been rather more chaotic than anticipated this week!)

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