Disclaimer – originally I had more of a serious post scheduled for today. However, I had some rather exciting news that I had to share with you all. I promise that normal service will resume tomorrow.
Quite a few of you have been asking for me to share how it went when I finally told my mum about making the shortlist for the BiBs but for now that is going to have to wait because I have had some really exciting news. Yesterday I was contacted by BBC Radio Jersey and asked if I would mind popping in for an interview about being shortlisted for the BiBs. Obviously, when I heard this news I played it very cool. In fact the words of Del Boy may have sprung to mind –
“play it nice and cool son, nice and cool. You know what I mean”
It would have been rude and criminal if I hadn’t included a classic bit of Only Fools and Horses.
Yes, there I was playing it cool. Hanging around like you do, just thinking, “sure I can pop in, sure no big deal” That is exactly how it went. I did not become extremely excited and text and ring everyone I know…..
How it really went
“Mum” I screech down the phone.
“Emma, why are you breathless, oh my goodness are you ok? Are you trying to exercise again. I have told that the hiit you insist on doing is not good for you! You need to stick to something nice and gentle like yoga. Where are you?”
“Mum, Mum it’s fine. I’ve got some exciting news……”
“Let me interrupt you there, I don’t think my heart can take anymore of your exciting news. Let me find a seat.”
My mum suddenly shouts down the phone, deafening me in the process.
“Michael move your toot from that seat, I need to sit down.” I can hear the sound of someone scrambling around and papers rustling. “Right, shoot, I am ready”
“Mum I am going to be on BBC Radio Jersey”
I get no response, just what I presume is stunned silence. “Mum” I repeat.
Then comes a voice of disbelief.
“What actual BBC Radio Jersey. The BBC.”
“Yes Mum” I exclaim.
“The BBC” she repeats.
“Yes Mum” I repeat getting exasperated.
“As in the British Broadcasting Corporation? Someone isn’t having you on?”
“No Mum, it’s legit. It is the BBC..” My mum suddenly interrupts.
“Oh I am all a flabbergasted. That’s just terrific. Just astounding. Just wait until I tell Eunice. Just wait. She won’t believe it. Oh I am thrilled for you”
“Oh thank you Mum, that is lovely…” My mum interrupts me again to start reeling instructions off.
” Right, you must not, I repeat must not get all nervous and talk too fast. You do talk rather fast”
“Mum, I am not completely inept you know, I used to give presentations to 30 plus teachers and I used to stand in front of classes of 30 plus children and they all seemed to be able to understand me”
“But did they? Did they really and were you even a good teacher?”
I rather abruptly answer.
“Well actually Ofsted seemed to think I was quite good”
“Pffft, what do they know, perhaps you were just having a good day and you were always saying that Ofsted were just a load of faceless wan….”
“Mum” I interrupt before she can finish. I realise then that she is rather enjoying winding me up. She then warms to her education theme.
“Emma, this is a fantastic opportunity. You need to use your air time wisely. You need to use it to tell them how this Tory government is systematically destroying our education system, you really….”
“Mum, I very much doubt that David Cameron or Nicky Morgan are going to be listening to the radio”
“They might, it’s the BBC you know”
“Yes Mum” I sigh.
“I am so happy because I know that I said I wouldn’t tell anyone but I did tell just a few people”
“Oh right, how many?” I ask feeling slightly nervous
“oh not many, now let’s see –
- Eunice next door.
- The fish man who delivers my fish on a Friday.
- Then the lovely lady who works in the chemist.
- The butcher where we get our sausages from.
- Then there is Olly who works in the hardware shop, lovely man he is too.
“Mum” I shout, “Mum, is that it?”
“Not quite –
- Then there are the lovely ladies who work in the cafe round the corner.
- The postman.
- All of the WI.
- The League of Friends.
- And the Mother’s Union.
Hmm, I feel like I am missing some…”
I can feel myself feeling sick, “really Mum, really? You think you might have left some out? You told me that you weren’t going to tell anyone this time, it sounds like you have told the whole flipping village again!”
My mum mumbles down the phone, “I might have got a little bit carried away”.
I feel guilty for getting slightly cross with my mum, “It’s ok Mum”
“Oh good” She answers brightly, “because I was thinking of taking out a little advert in the Advertiser just to try to drum up support for you”.
“Mum, that’s very kind of you but no. I need to go now as Youngest is drawing a moustache on Oldest’s face and I have a feeling it’s my permanent pen”
“Oh, ok then but before you go I have some words of wisdom to impart onto you”
I stifle a giggle.
“Ok Mum, what are these little gems?”
“Get your hair done”
“Haha, it’s a radio” I reply feeling sightly smug.
“Yes, I realise that but a woman always feel more confident when she’s had her hair done. Also don’t think of the thousands and thousands of people who will be listening”
I start to feel really sick again.
“Mum, you are making me sick with nerves”
“And that leads me onto my next tip. Have a vodka and tonic before you go on air. Works a treat”.
“Mum, I don’t drink spirits”
“Well now is the time to start” She trills. “Anyway got to dash. I’ve got a date with a maypole but before I go a very wise man once said to me – video killed the radio star”
“Mum, I am pretty sure that is a song and why are you telling me this…” I then realise I am talking to a dialing tone.
Disclaimer – parts of this conversation may have been exaggerated. However, most of it wasn’t.
I will be on BBC Jersey radio at 2:40pm today. I am a little bit scared but on the plus side it means Mr C is doing the school run for me this afternoon. WIN. If you fancy listening to me trying not to make a tit of myself then please do and keep your fingers crossed for me. You can listen to me on BBC iplayer. I can promise you that I won’t be drinking a vodka and tonic before I go on air. I can’t promise you that I won’t make a fool out of myself.
Vote for me
Now for the compulsory tag on paragraph that I know so many of you must be fed-up of seeing!
If you would be really kind to vote for me in the BiBs in the Fresh Category then I would be a very happy, happy lady. It is very easy. You just clink the link>>>>>>> HERE
Or you can click on the BiBs badge in my sidebar. You then just need to fill in your email and click on Island Living 365 and submit. It is as easy as that. Thank you 🙂
Wish me luck!