This August Mr C and I will celebrate 10 years of marriage. An achievement that I’m pretty proud of and one that Mr C deserves a medal for. This milestone has got me thinking about how our relationship has evolved. The biggest change being romance;
- Back then it was all about the seduction. You would wear sexy underwear, spend the day flirting up a storm by text and then when you do see each other clothes would be ripped off. Now your underwear is definitely not matching, it is old, greying and if it still fits then that is your version of sexy. You now send him texts reminding him that milk needs to bought on the way home; telling him that if you hear the soundtrack to Frozen one more time you will self combust and moaning that the house is a tip-again!
- Back then you would retire to bed early for a bit of ‘romance’, then you would spend the night into early morning chatting, before falling asleep in each other’s arms. Now you realise that a bed is for sleep and now your idea of romance is not nicking all the covers.
- Back then you loved the smell of each other, now your husband smells of what you suspect is stale farts and most days you give off a faint whiff of baby sick. Romance is when you are so tired and you can’t remember if you applied deodorant that your husband takes a big sniff under your arms to check for you.
- Back then what happened in the bathroom was a mystery and remained behind closed doors. Now you never ever get to close the bathroom door and your toilet habits are normally shared with an audience, namely your children but sometimes your husband too. Romance is that you are no longer shy about your toilet habits and your husband loves you for it.
- Back then you found his jokes and story telling hilarious, now you have heard the same joke and story at least a hundred times but the romance is that you still laugh whilst inwardly muttering “so many times”.
- Back then you would eat in romantic restaurants that had candles on the table and food that was overpriced and in tiny portions. Now you eat in restaurants that have crayons on the table, food that is beige and portions that are huge and cheap. Now the romance is when you don’t have to cook.
- Back then you would lovingly spend hours in the kitchen whipping up a romantic meal now it’s romantic when you remove the ready meal from the tray and put it on a plate.
- Back then your husband thought you were naturally beautiful, now he realises that it takes a truckload of cosmetics and a razor to the legs, frequently. Your idea of romance is when he tells you that you have lovely legs, ignoring the ever growing stubble.
- Back then Valentine’s day was about flowers, wine and a nice meal out. Now it is about watching your choice of programme on Netflix and sipping a mug of tea.
- Back then you felt like you would never know everything about them, now you know absolutely everything about them, in fact you know them better than they know themselves.
So our relationship may no longer have the aura of mystery but that sense of mystery is pretty hard to maintain when they have witnessed you giving birth! But I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Now we can both be ourselves and it’s all about the small things - the kind thoughts, like being given a lie-in or when you make each other laugh via text with the mushroom emoji. Or when you share a cuddle on the sofa, just because.
Now that’s romance.
Has your idea of romance changed?
We’ll be married ten years later this year. In some way things are similar to how they were in the beginning, but I can also identify with a lot of your points here - the bathroom, Valentines and the jokes you have hears a million times.
#twinklytuesday
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haha, yep but we love them all the more for those jokes :-)
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Romance has DEFINITELY changed for me and my husband. We’ve been married for almost 6 years and together for 13, and our days of romantic dinners are definitely over now that we have a baby. But I don’t think it’s worse - just different. I’m quite happy for us to spend an evening on the couch watching Netflix together - if fact, I probably prefer it to a fancy night out. :) #TwinklyTuesday
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Yes same here. I actually really like where we are in our relationship. It’s lovely and I much prefer a night in with husband than a night out on the tiles :-)
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going on ten years together, I can relate to all of these. A romantic gesture now is noticing the toilet paper is low in each other’s bathrooms and putting a new roll nearby
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Oh yes the toilet roll is a good one!
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Love this and found myself nodding along. We are six years married in May and like yours our relationship is different but I do kinda like it. Of course I miss the excitment of the Pre kids days a little but I love that we are a now a team depending on each other more and the time we do spend just us is so much more special! xx
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Yes any opportunity you get together without the kids is very much appreciated nowadays! Even going for a coffee without the kids is a real novelty :-)
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Gorgeous post. Glad I found your blog. And to answer that question…would take a long time. Don’t be surprised to see a twitter DM from me with a link to a certain post about my own anniversary sentiments!! Disclaimer: I do love him though. #TwinklyTuesday
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haha I look forward to reading your post! I should also add the same disclaimer that I do love Mr C, a lot! :-)
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Lol so true! My idea of romance is my tea being cooked and the ice being scraped off my car! It so changes but the love is still there. Happy Anniversary and have a lovely date! Thanks for sharing with #bestandworst xx
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Ah this is such a fun read! I nodded along with every point you made. Romance sure does change after having kids - for the better I think although it’s nice to think back to the early days of romance. My husband & I are married 10 years this July! The time has flown by. Happy Anniversary to you & your hubby! #TwinklyTuesday x
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Awwww same to you too, we are celebrating ours in August!
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I love this and was nodding all the way through. Especially about the restaurants. Beige / cheap / crayons… yep yep yep!
I’m now off to check out the mushroom emoji…. can’t wait! :)
Dawn x
#bestandworst
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haha, I think the mushroom emoji will disappoint! We just send each other random emojis because we are mature like that…
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Yes to all of these! I’ve got no idea how romance has changed for us except that there isn’t any!! #bestandworst
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haha you don’t mean that. There will still be romance there, we just have to look harder for it :-) Well that is what I tell myself daily ;-)
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Mmmm - perhaps it’s in the back of a cupboard somewhere..!!
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Actually kind of a relief to read this. We’ve come out the other side of the newborn days and are now realising that things will never be the same! Not that it’s all bad of course, just that it takes a bit more effort to find the romance in the little things :)
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Exactly, there is still romance we just have to look a bit harder for it :-)
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Speak for yourself love. My relationship is just as exciting as it was ten years ago!
Just kidding, this is 100% spot on. Made me giggle and then weep a little for my youth! #coolmumclub
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haha! At least we can relax a bit more than we did in our youth. I spent far too much time worrying about what I was wearing and how I looked now it’s a miracle if I have a bit of mascara on and clothes that aren’t stained with the children’s food! Oh my husband is a lucky man ;-)
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So true! Me and the hubby barely spend any time together with our working hours so the lack of romance is definitely there but romance makes me awkward anyway. I think relationships evolve and it’s not all about the flirting anymore, it’s about having a companion in life. #coolmumclub
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You are right they do evolve and that’s what makes it fun :-)
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We’ve been married nearly 16 years - the mystery has completely gone! But Rev T is still the best husband ever. I may be biased though. Fabulous post as always, have a great week :)
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Awww that’s lovely and 16 years too :- ) Thanks for your kind comment x
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Absolutely! The way to my heart these days is definitely a meal that I didn’t cook :-) Even if it comes in red packaging emblazoned with a golden ‘M’ ;-)
Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub
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oh the golden arches is my fave! Because the kids get a toy too. Win. :-)
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Very true. Although I do love a snuggle on the sofa :) Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics
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you can’t beat a good snuggle on the sofa!
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