There I was innocently perusing the internet when I read a story that was so horrifying I nearly choked on my chocolate roll. Don’t worry, I didn’t. The story in question was about naked bums on seats and we are not talking on seats in the privacy of your own home! No, we are talking about naked bums on seats in a restaurant. Yes, a naked restaurant has only gone and opened up in London. Now my first thoughts were -

 

1. Oh my good grief who are the owners of this restaurant. Cue frantic googling and then relief when I realised that it was not my mum and dad. Regular readers of my blog will realise they do have a fondness for getting naked!
2. My second thought was to make a mental note to never, ever, tell my mum and dad about this restaurant for the above reason.

 

 

Purely for blog research I decided to read up some more about this restaurant. I must stress that this was purely for research, I have no desire to get naked in a restaurant or visit a naked restaurant - honest. I never want to set foot in a restaurant that has had hairy buttocks gracing seats. The restaurant did not sell itself to me. It described the restaurant as serving,

 

” wood flame meals”

 

Two words in that sentence are so wrong when you are dealing with a naked restaurant. I am going to avoid the first one - ‘wood’ and the oh so obvious innuendo. Instead let’s focus on the second word - ‘flame’. That’s right flames. Real. Life. HOT. Flames. Surely, flames are never a good thing when it comes to general nakedness and swinging chipolatas. But then they go onto say that they have,

 

“a canopy of candlelights”

 

Yep, not a few but a whole canopy. Does that not spell danger or maybe toasty todger? Sizzling sausage? Ok, I will stop. Surely, no one will want to eat in this restaurant, right? Wrong, the restaurant has a waiting list of 30,000 people. That’s right, there are 30,000 naked bums waiting to eat in this restaurant. The mind boggles.

 

Perhaps it’s me, perhaps I am being all prudish about it. I will admit that when I was a lot younger, I suddenly became very interested in cookery shows. I could cite my GCSE in Home Economics class but really it was the title of said cookery programme - The Naked Chef. Sadly, Jamie was not naked but still it was quite a good a cookery show. A show that seemed to involve him whizzing down the banisters of his stairs on his fully clothed bum. However, I don’t think I am being prudish by not wanting to eat in a restaurant in the buff. I wouldn’t want to eat in the nude because it is not practical. What would they serve? Spaghetti? Soup? What about the potential for spillage? Think about the burns you could get from spilling your hot coffee *shudders*.

 

 

 

The whole naked restaurant has got me thinking that perhaps the restaurant world is starting to go a little crazy. We have had dining in the dark which again screams potential for disaster,

 

“Oh sorry, I thought I was reaching for the pepper not your……”

 

Then there was the cereal shop where hipsters could go and eat a bowl of Frosties and pay around £6 for the pleasure of it. Surely, a restaurant shouldn’t be gimmicky. Apparently, the reason that this restaurant is proving such a success is because a lot of people eat naked at home. Do they? Who are these people? What are they eating? I can safely say that I have never in my whole life eaten naked. Quite frankly when I am eating my muffins I do not want to be distracted by my muffin top. No, in my household there is a strictly clothed policy; all muffin-tops, baps and sausages need to be covered up.

 

Mum, Dad are you listening? When we eat we keep it covered up 😉

 

*I apologise for all poor food based puns that were used in this article. I would also like to add that this is not meant to offend naturists. This post was merely me questioning the naked restaurant and whether I would want to eat there. Regular readers of my blog will realise that I struggle with nudity! However, I am full of admiration for people who feel comfortable naked and I wish that I had their confidence. In the words of my mum I am a ‘prude’.*

 

 

In Island Living 365 the glorious excess of Christmas has meant that we are aware of our clothes feeling that little bit too snug. As a result we are back to eating healthily. However, this never-ending rain screams comfort food which can be high in calories. This Easy Healthy Chilli is the perfect compromise, healthy, delicious and so very comforting. We eat this as a family but if it is just Mr C and I then we increase the measure of spices for some extra heat.

 

To serve 4 you will need:

• groundnut or olive oil
• 2 onions peeled and chopped
• 500g turkey mince
• 1 tin of chopped tomatoes (plum will also work just break them up when cooking)
• 1 red pepper chopped
• 1 teaspoon of ground chilli (if you aren’t cooking for children you could double, but this gives a nice background heat)
• 1/2 teaspoon of curry powder (1 teaspoon if you aren’t cooking for children)
• 1/2 tablespoon chilli sauce (or 1 if not cooking for children)
• 400g haricot beans
• creme fraiche (or soured cream if you are feeling naughty)
• coriander leaves

Suggested toppings and accompaniments (some healthier than others):

 

• avocado sliced
• cauliflower rice
• brown rice
• sweet potato wedges or baked
• courgetti
• taco shells
• tortilla wraps (nice cut into strips and toasted in the oven)
• Cheese
• Nachos

 

 

Put a little of your olive or groundnut oil into a pan and heat up gently. Whilst you are waiting for the oil to get hot peel and roughly chop your onions. Add them to the oil and over a gentle heat start cooking. You want to take your time doing this to get them as sweet and soft as possible.

 

 

Whilst your onions are cooking roughly chop your red pepper and then add to the pan with the onions. When the onions are looking a pale, golden colour and the red pepper has softened you need to remove the onions and pepper from the pan and put into a bowl to one side. Then you need to add your turkey mince to the pan and brown it lightly. Stir it occasionally to help it brown and break it up a little. Then add your chilli powder, curry powder and chilli sauce.

 

Stir it all together and leave for a couple of minutes for the spices to do their
magic. Now return the onions and pepper to the pan and give a good stir.

Add your drained haricot beans and your tin of tomatoes. Bring to the boil and then simmer for 7-10 minutes until it is hot all the way through.

 

 

 

 

When your chilli is ready add a couple of tablespoons of your creme fraiche or soured cream on top and sprinkle with coriander leaves.

 

 

Bring to the table and let everyone tuck in. This is the perfect dish to warm you up in this dreary weather.

Enjoy!