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Island Living 365

Feminist in Hiding

February 10, 2016

The other day it occured to me that I might be raising feminists. This isn’t something that I have set out to do deliberately and I wouldn’t have labeled myself a feminist (as I’m not a big lover of labels) but I have come to realise that I do have feminist views.  When I was a child growing up in the outer reaches of Essex we didn’t really have the feminist movement. The 60s had seen the first modern wave of it which was when my Mum was a young woman starting out in the workplace. It hadn’t really made a difference to my Mum and her life. For example my Mum was very accademic and she really wanted to go to university to train to be a teacher. However, my Grandad wouldn’t allow it and so she did what was expected of her which was to go to secretarial school and then get married. The arrival of our first female Prime Minister in the 80s saw the second wave of feminism. Women believed that they could have equality and we saw this represented in the fashion world by power suits with big shoulder pads, the  motto being the bigger the better. But as with the first wave the feminist movement died down again until the 1990s when in pop music we had the Spice Girls and ‘Girl Power’. For me this was when I started to become aware of the feminist movement. Later when I went to university (something that had my Mum had been denied all those years earlier), I became even more aware of women’s rights and to a certain degree felt indebted to the feminist movement.

 

I was able to go to University because women before me had fought for this right

 

Today we have easy access to technology. Information at our fingertips, 24 hours a day. This means that when an event occurs on the other side of the world we know about it almost instantly, like it’s happening in the next room. As a result of the internet we are more aware than ever of the injustice that is going on in the world and more aware than ever of the inequality in the world. We read about the uproar surrounding the Oscars from our armchairs whilst having breakfast and we stumble upon feminist views whilst eating our lunch. Feminism is stronger than ever and its growth is firmly rooted in the internet. You can read about it on blogs, facebook, tweets etc.

 

In just a few clicks we can all enlighten ourselves.

 

 

This is a good thing, right? Well, yes in that it now means that any sniff of sexism from a celebrity or politician will be splashed all over the internet. An “ordinary” person deemed sexist could find themselves with the hashtag everyday sexism. Therefore are we saying that feminism will no longer happen in waves, that this time it is here to stay for good? In a word, no. This new very visible feminism is now provoking something of a nasty backlash. I’m talking trolls and not the cute sort from the 80s. I’m talking the faceless sort that that hide behind their computer screens.

 

 

In this very modern age in what is supposed to be a very civilised society, women are being attacked online for their feminist views. On a daily basis you can find mysognistic tweets and as a result of this vitriol many women are quite understandably retreating from vocalising their views in public.

 

It saddens me that in 2016 a woman still can’t freely express her beliefs without the risk  of violent threats. I find it sad that again having a feminist opinion is something we don’t want to admit too. Something that we feel the need to hide or whisper about from behind closed curtains.

 

 

This new era of publicialy humilating online has seen many outspoken feminists retreating from the public sphere. Lena Durham being one of them. Previously a very vocal feminist Lena chose to retreat from Twitter after getting fed-up of the constant sniping and attacking of her views. Many blogs that once had feminist articles for all to read are stopping and replacing them with newsletters instead. The idea being that you can still read about feminist news and opinions but from the safety of your own inbox, away from other judging eyes. But isn’t this against the whole spirit of the movement? Are we not supposed to be expressing our femininist views in an open arena because we can; because we live in a free society, because we are equals? By taking the option of debate away are we not moving the feminist movement back? Is the newsletter not the equivelent of feminists going back home behind closed doors?

 

 

Surely for future generations we need to open that door and go back outside. We need to let everyone hear our voices. If we are to make progress we need to keep moving forward and we can’t do this if we are hiding in our safe spaces. We owe it to our children; we owe it to the women before us, we need to stand up for what we believe in.

 

“Here’s to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them” Anon.

 

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

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Filed Under: General, Musings

  1. Kate Tunstall, Refined Prose says

    February 10, 2016 at 8:23 am

    Nice post. I agree that we should be able to openly speak up about our beliefs.

    I also think it’s vital to remember the true meaning of feminism: in many cases, if you ask a man if he’s a feminist, he’ll say no; if you ask him in be believes in gender equality he’ll day yes – not realising it’s the very same thing.

    Unfortunately the term itself seems to be quite inflammatory. X

    #BloggerClubUK

    • islandliving365 says

      February 10, 2016 at 9:17 am

      Yes you are right, it is the label feminist that has become so inflamatory and not the cause itself and we all need to remember that 🙂

  2. Dean B says

    February 10, 2016 at 6:30 pm

    When I was a student at Uni, I used to have hardcore feminist views and would argue anyone down about it. My mum had to fight not just sexism but also racism. I’m from the Philippines and in the late 60s, she received a grant to get her MS in Physics. At that time, there weren’t many female students in her chosen field, let alone someone from the Far East! But in spite bullying and racists comments, she persevered. At any early age, she drilled it in my head, never ever let anyone make me feel inferior. She reminded me time and again how important “self-worth is”. I’m trying to teach that to my daughter too. You’re so right about having to keep talking about it, even if we have to shout till we’re blue in the face, so be it. Although in my blog, admittedly I don’t really talk about “controversial” topics, not because I’m afraid of an argument, but I blog mostly about my daughter you see and I don’t want her to be a target of trolls… I know it doesn’t make sense, but that’s how I feel. #BloggerClubUK

    • islandliving365 says

      February 10, 2016 at 6:56 pm

      What a brilliant role model you had in your Mum 🙂 I know what you mean about not wanting to talk about “controversial” topics and I didn’t set out to but I was trolled over what I felt was an innocent enough post and my initial reaction was one of horror and to pull it down but then I realised that it was one person’s opinion and that if I did it then he would have “won”. I also understand about the worry of trolls targeting your daughter as I worry about that too which is why I don’t reveal their names and take photos of them from the back if that makes sense? I think this will be my last ranting post anyway as it was me getting it all of my chest after what happened 🙂

      • Dean B says

        February 10, 2016 at 7:01 pm

        Oh no! Sorry to hear about your experience. Must have been awful! I don’t mention my daughter’s name either and used to only post photos of her back. But then decided against it, I do love taking photos of her 😉 I think if you or we or anyone has strong views about something and that we absolutely think we have to write about it, so be it, right? As for now, I’m sticking to writing about the countryside 😉

        • islandliving365 says

          February 10, 2016 at 7:47 pm

          Oh it was really mild! I got off very lightly, it was just a twitter account that targeted anyone who said anything vaguely feminist but the result of that was that I wrote two other posts but I think that it’s for it now and I will go back to writing my cookery and interior posts 🙂 ps love a good countryside post too!

  3. TheMadHouse says

    February 10, 2016 at 11:42 pm

    Trolling is horrible and I have experienced it. I am raising feminist boys and I am not going to apologise for it. I want my boys to know that women are equal to them. That a strong woman birthed them and I will not have it any other way. My mum was expected to give up work when I was born and dutifully did. She was upset that I chose to become an SAHM, she saw it as a betrayal. I told her it was a CHOICE and one I had thanks to her and other women. I am so lucky I married a man that believes in partnership and loves me because od who I am!

    • islandliving365 says

      February 11, 2016 at 8:03 am

      I’m sorry that you have to experience trolling but I love your attitude and you sound like you are doing a fab job in raising your boys! I need to take a leaf out of your blog and stop apologising for what I believe in! Like you say it’s our choice 🙂

  4. littlehouselea says

    February 11, 2016 at 4:19 pm

    Great post. It really made me think about feminism and my attitude toward it and how this impacts on my parenting. And I just love that quote at the end: ‘Here’s to strong women, may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.’ It’s my new mantra!
    And sorry to hear about people’s experiences with trolling, it really is horrendous.

    • islandliving365 says

      February 11, 2016 at 4:25 pm

      Thanks for your kind words and yaay to new mantras 🙂

  5. sarah admissions of a working mother says

    February 12, 2016 at 7:28 pm

    Brilliant – you are a woman after my own heart! Absolutely agree with you. I wrote about Lena Dunham a few months ago. I originally know her from her show Girls but I really admire her message and how she is just herself and advocates for women #fabfridaypost

    • islandliving365 says

      February 12, 2016 at 8:00 pm

      Yaaay-thanks for your kind words. I love Lena. I am going to have to have a read of your post now 🙂

  6. islandliving365 says

    February 12, 2016 at 7:59 pm

    Yes, come back Lena! 🙂

  7. min1980 says

    February 12, 2016 at 8:38 pm

    I have also experienced trolling and it is so unpleasant and unnecessary. I don’t know if I could be strong enough to put up with it all the time like a lot of women in the public eye do. It’s great that the internet has given so many people a voice who didn’t previously have one, but unfortunate that that includes some less desirable elements too! #FabFridayPost

    • islandliving365 says

      February 13, 2016 at 8:21 am

      I’m sorry to hear that you were trolled. Yes, it’s just a shame that the internet seems to embolden some people into thinking that it is acceptable to be very unplesant on the internet.

  8. Jess Powell (Babi a Fi) says

    February 12, 2016 at 9:57 pm

    Trolling is the worst, and I hate how common dog piling is too so that even after a person sees their error and apologises, there’s no end to it. The internet will only become more integral to our lives though, and I think there will be a shift in what we think is acceptable to say and do to other people over a screen because the idea you can be completely anonymous online is just less and less feasible. x #fabfridaypost

  9. veronica lee says

    February 14, 2016 at 3:47 pm

    The internet has unleashed unlimited freedom and power for haters and trolls to spew their venom and hate as these cowards find it easier to say things like that behind the anonymity of a computer.

    #KCACOLS

  10. tammymum says

    February 15, 2016 at 8:35 am

    Great post, and I wholeheartedly agree. I too have come to the realisation that I have been a feminist in hiding and I intend to raise my girl and boy to the same tune, so to speak. It is quite simply outrageous that in today’s world women are targeted for their feminist views, whilst the Internet is a marvellous place it certainly has its downsides and this sadly is one of them. Really enjoyed your post #KCACOLS

    • islandliving365 says

      February 15, 2016 at 8:38 am

      Thanks for your comment 🙂

  11. Becky, Cuddle Fairy says

    February 15, 2016 at 4:13 pm

    I love that strong women quote – it’s one of my favorites! That’s a real shame that feminism is being pushed off the internet. It’s interesting that blogs have changed to news letters for those who want to read it. The internet is full of so many different views – everyone should be free to add their opinions out there openly. Thanks so much for linking up with #bloggerclubuk x

  12. occupation:(m)other says

    February 15, 2016 at 6:19 pm

    . Like you, I don’t like labels and calling myself a feminist was something I over thought hugely…it’s got connotations. But I believe in gender equality and ‘equalist’ is fine but often needs explaining so I’ve got for it, label and everything! The Internet can be a strange place…I agree that people hide behind the anonymity to say what they like…I hope it doesn’t dampen everyone vocal. Really interesting post and it seems a worrying trend. Open debate should absolutely still take place, I agree!! #KCACOLS

    • islandliving365 says

      February 15, 2016 at 7:59 pm

      Thanks for your comment, perhaps I need to embrace the label too 🙂 and here’s to more open debates!

  13. mummyhereandthere says

    February 15, 2016 at 7:57 pm

    I think language is such an interesting area with feminism. I still feel their are equalities but glad that there are improvements and changes made. So much more needs to be done to make it fairer for both. X #KCACOLS

    • islandliving365 says

      February 15, 2016 at 8:00 pm

      Yes, there is still much more to be done but hopefully it will continue to move in the right direction. Thanks for your comment 🙂

  14. moderatemum says

    February 17, 2016 at 8:51 pm

    It makes me so angry! These attacks on feminism are why we still need to keep talking about it – it’s treated like silly women wittering on about their silly things. Can you imagine if other minority groups got similar treatments. I like that recently more men have been speaking on the subject but it also annoys me that they get treated with more respect for their views.

  15. The Speed Bump says

    February 23, 2016 at 9:09 pm

    I love this post SO much. I’m a staunch feminist. I’ve been called a “feminazi” before – because yes, you can really compare killing millions of people, with the radical notion that people should be equal, right? Brilliant post #KCACOLS

    • islandliving365 says

      February 23, 2016 at 9:13 pm

      I can’t believe that you have been called a “feminazi” before, that is completely outrageous!

  16. A Moment with Franca says

    February 26, 2016 at 2:28 pm

    I agree with you. Even though we now have all the tools to be more open and talk about our beliefs thanks to the internet, I must say that there are lots of haters out there that won’t understand and will of course ruin the whole purpose of the message. I have never experienced a troll before but I really think they are outrageous and it just ruins the whole experience. I don’t know if I’m a feminist but I do strongly believe in equality and that women should have the same opportunities than men. I went to a blogging conference last year and we had a talk about women in higher position that are not being paid the same amount of money than man! I find that disgusting. Why will man get the higher salary for the same position? Things like that are not right and of course we need to speak up. Let’s hope for a better world! Thanks so much for sharing this at #KCACOLS. I’m so happy to have you for the first time. And I’m so sorry that the first time you linked up we had this long break and also that I took longer to comment. It is not normally like that. I also would like to say thank you for commenting a fair amount within the linky. I really Iove that!! I hope that you would like to join me again on Sunday! 🙂 x

    • islandliving365 says

      February 26, 2016 at 4:35 pm

      Thanks for you comment, I would love to join on Sunday 🙂 x

  17. Sarah (@SarahRooftops) says

    March 1, 2016 at 7:50 pm

    Fantastic post. We’ve had so many years of women fighting against visible sexism to improve our place in the world and it’s heartbreaking that the current generation of feminists is feeling the need to hide from it – completely understandable but so disappointing that the trolls are still out there, bullying anyone they perceive to be weaker than them.

    • islandliving365 says

      March 1, 2016 at 7:56 pm

      Thanks, Sarah. Yes, the trolls have a lot to answer for but hopefully in the long run they won’t deter people from standing up for what believe in. It would be a very sad world if this was the case. If anything we should be trying to encourage debate. I hope that by the time my girls are adults that this is the case again.

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Hi, I’m Emma

Mum to two girls and wife to Mr C.
We used to live in wild and wonderful Yorkshire on the edge of the moors. We have now moved to the rather lovely and sunny Jersey, Channel Islands. Read about our adventures here.

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