I am confused. What does being a feminist actually mean nowadays? One minute I am being told that being a feminist means I should be taking selfies and embracing the way I look. Complete fail there then. The next minute I am being told that a true feminist is still stuck in the 1970s and that I shouldn’t be shaving my armpits. Partial win there but not out of choice more out of time constraints. Before you go eugh, I am talking about a couple of days of stubble. Oh see what I did there? I felt the need to qualify how hairy I was. A definite feminist fail.
When I went to university I believed that I was a feminist because I drank pints and I liked to challenge the boys to drinking contests. Which I won by the way (I’m sure my mum is very proud 😉 ). However, now I realise that this act itself does not make me a feminist. So am I a feminist? Have I ever been a feminist?
What is a feminist?
I feel that feminism has lost its way. We spend so much time debating about what a feminist is that we have lost sight of the important things. A feminist isn’t about the way we look, the photos we take or the clothes we wear. Being a feminist is about what we believe in and the values we hold close to our heart. I am a feminist because I believe in equality. I don’t like writing down that I am a feminist because last time I did that I was trolled. I was trolled for my choice of word. That in itself is proof that feminists still have a cause to fight. Feminism should be about choice and ensuring that woman have that choice. I am a stay-at-home-mum and that is my choice. A choice that I made. A choice that I shouldn’t be criticised for. Yet I still am. Some believe that walking away from my career was a big mistake. Some of you reading my blog might think that too but the point is that it is my mistake to make. I should be celebrated for the choice I have made, not criticised. Just as I would celebrate all the women who choose to work full-time.
We are told that a feminist is Margaret Thatcher for running the country. We are told that a feminist is Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City for choosing to nearly bankrupt herself with her shoe habit. Apparently this represented independence, I think it actually says something rather alarming about consumerism but I digress. We are told that Kim Kardashian is a feminist because she gets her boobs out online and apparently that is empowering. But this isn’t feminism. I find it very hard to believe that every time Kim Kardashian takes a photo she is thinking about the feminist statement she is making. The reality is that she is a little bit narcissistic. Note the drop of sarcasm there when I say little. The label feminism has lost its way and it is now down to us reclaim it so here are what I belive the qualities of a feminist to be. Could you be a feminist?
Desperately seeking feminists to join the cause. We are now a dwindling breed and we require members to join our gang. You don’t need to be cool just be prepared to stand up for what you believe in.
Male or female required to fight the cause of feminism. Appearance irrelevant, whether you choose to shave or not doesn’t make a difference and the clothes you wear means nothing too.
Young or old come and get involved.
You must be prepared to have your voice heard. Not be afraid of trolls. Most importantly you must resist all attempts by the media to caricature feminism. Feminism is not just bra burning, hairy arm pit flashing and boob sharing. Feminism is about choice and supporting one another.
Equal of course….in that there is no pay for any of us. Just the smug satisfaction that what we are doing is great for the world and the future of humanity.
Who is with me? Are you a feminist?
It’s your choice of course 😉
What do you believe makes a feminist?
Before I go I am just going to mention that I have been shortlisted for the BiBs under Fresh Voice. I know bonkers but rather terrifically bonkers. I still can’t believe it and I hope it sinks in soon. In the meantime I would love if you would consider voting for me. You can do that by clicking >>>>>>>>>> here<<<<<<<<